A Day in the Life

A day in the life of a single mom with two kids:

5:30 am Wake to find Y Baby is asleep on my arm. Try to move her without waking her.
6:00 am Alarm goes off. Get up and get in shower.
6:10 am O brings a screaming Y into the bathroom and dumps her unceremoniously onto the floor. “She wants you.”
6:11 am Climb out of half-finished shower to hold baby.
6:15 am Give both girls a bowl of cereal.
6:16 am Force Waba to go outside (or else he will be eating the cereal)
6:17 am Return to shower
6:20 am Back to kitchen to check on girls
6:21 am Back to bathroom to finish getting ready
6:23 am Back to kitchen to see why Y Baby is crying
6:24 am Pick up spoon on floor, put in sink. Find baby a clean spoon.
6:26 am Return to bathroom to try to style now frizzing hair.
6:35 am Return to kitchen. Clean up cereal from table, floor, baby’s pajamas.
6:40 am Wrangle both girls back into the bedroom to get dressed.
6:41 am Try to change Y Baby’s diaper as she crawls squealing across the bed.
6:43 am Ask O to get dressed.
6:44 am Finally get clean diaper on baby
6:45 am Ask O to get dressed. Again.
6:46 am Dress the baby
6:47 am Ask O to get dressed. FOR THE THIRD TIME.
6:51 am Search room for baby’s other shoe that was just on the bed a minute ago
6:52 am Tell O that if she doesn’t get dressed immediately she is going to school in her nightgown
6:53 am Spend 10 minutes trying to dry O’s drama queen tears over being “yelled at”
6:54 am Put baby on the floor so she will stop pulling sister’s hair since sister is already crying
7:03 am Ask O one more time to please get dressed
7:04 am Get self dressed
7:05 am Help O take off nightgown
7:07 am Put baby back on bed so she will stop screaming
7:08 am Finish getting self dressed. Realize O is now naked.
7:09 am Dress O.
7:12 am Heard both girls into the bathroom to brush teeth/wash faces
7:14 am Chase Y Baby down the hall and carry back to bathroom
7:15 am Find O standing in middle of the bathroom
7:16 am Prepare toothbrushes and toothpaste for everyone
7:17 am Tell O to brush her teeth
7:18 am Brush baby’s teeth
7:19 am Tell O to brush her teeth. Again.
7:20 am Baby wipes toothpaste all over Mommy’s shirt
7:21 am Tell O to stop singing to the mirror and brush her teeth
7:22 am Try to wipe toothpaste off shirt
7:23 am Tell O that if she doesn’t brush her teeth NOW Mommy is going to lose it
7:24 am Help O brush her teeth
7:27 am Finish brushing baby’s teeth
7:30 am Wash both girl’s faces
7:34 am Brush O’s hair (Y Baby has no hair)
7:36 am Try to get both girls to head for the van
7:37 am Stop to give Waba food and water
7:39 am Drag girls out to the van
7:40 am Strap baby into car seat
7:41 am Help O get her seat buckled
7:42 am Get in van, open garage door
7:43 am Realize that Waba is still outside
7:44 am Go back in to let the dog in
7:45 am Get back in car, ask baby to please stop screaming as Mommy has returned
7:46 am Pull out of drive way and remind myself that I signed up for this

Yeah, I know I said a day in the life, but you get the point.

Ying Goes to the Park

While Mama is busy at work, and Big Sister is busy at school, little Miss Ying is busy playing at the park. This is how she spends her days. It's a rough life, huh?

Swingin'

When you are a kid, summer time should be all about fun. It’s bare feet, ice cream cones, riding bikes, splashing in a pool, tan legs, and swinging on your swing set.

Summer time, when you’re a Mama, is not all fun. There’s still work and bills and grass that needs to be mowed. But mixed in with all that, there is the joy of watching your children discovering how much fun a swing set can be. So, last night the dishes and the laundry were ignored while I watched my two little girls enjoying their very own swing set. Just look at those faces. That’s what fun looks like. (And a big THANK YOU to Uncle Sauce-ear for helping me set up the swing set. As O would say, you are cool.)

I tiss Mama

That was Ying’s first sentence. This weekend she said, “I tiss Mama” clear as a bell (that’s “I kiss Mama” for those who don’t speak toddler). She had been trying to kiss me, and I was teasing her by acting like I didn’t know what she wanted. When she finally managed to kiss me, she laughed and said, “I tiss Mama’. Oh, you have no idea how sweet that sounded! Her little giggle is like pure sugar, and her voice just makes me smile every time I hear it. Yeah, I love that little girl.

Dinner Time!

One Down, One to Go

Guess who has slept in her own bed for the last three (count 'em -3!) nights in a row? Yes, that's right, my big girl is sleeping in her big girl bed. Little Bit got to me with the crying, "Mama, Mama, Mama." I couldn't take it, so she is still sleeping under my arm. One of these days, they will both be sleeping in their own room! Maybe before I'm 50!

Ying and Bing

First, I have to say “WAAAAAAA HOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I found out this morning that Bing’s surgery has been completely funded! Yes, that’s right. Little Bing will soon be fitted for his new leg, thanks to the generosity of people who see the value of every child – even the ones we’ll never meet. Of course, Love Without Boundaries still has other children who need medical care. Like Hao, a little 9 year old girl who needs $2450 for a Cornea Transplant. Donations are tax deductable. Hey, I'm just putting it out there.

Now, about Ying’s eyes. When I took Ying to see the ophthalmic plastic surgeon last month he diagnosed Ying with a condition called Blepharophimosis. Blepharophimosis is a collection of birth deformities. They include: small eyelids that are short in vertical dimensions in some cases causing the lower eyelid to be too short to adequately cover the eye (in Ying's case, it appears that the lower lid rolls in), eyelids shorter from side to side, eyes spread apart from each other that make the nose look like it is flat, ptosis, arching of eyebrows, bones above eyes slightly flattened, and a fold of extra tissue near the central corner of the eye opening. Yeah, that pretty much describes my Ying.

So, I did a little research on Blepharophimosis. It is an extremely rare genetic disorder. This kind of surprised me because Dr. L diagnosed it very casually. So casually, in fact that I didn’t even ask any questions. OK, I’ll admit it – I thought it was just what you call it when someone has both ptosis and epiblepharon. I couldn’t let go of the fact that it is really rare. So, then I started to wonder how much Dr. L really knows about it and how many times he has seen it. Then I started to worry about whether or not his treatment plan is the best thing for Ying. So, I started looking around to see if I could find a doctor who could be considered a “specialist”. Well, the internet is a wonderful thing. I found a support group for families with Blepharophimosis, and a woman from Ft. Wayne told me that there is a doctor at Riley Children’s Hospital who has treated several kids with this condition, including her daughter. So, we have an appointment at Riley on May 11th. I just want this guy to confirm Dr. L’s diagnosis (or not) and tell me if going ahead with this particular surgery is the right way to proceed (or not). I’ve never asked for a second opinion before, but then again, I’ve never been told that my child has a rare disorder before, either.

If the second opinion doc agrees with our current treatment plan, Ying will have surgery as scheduled on June 8th. It is out-patient surgery, and supposedly she will be up and about by dinner time. Whew. Parenting isn’t for the weak!

Flower Power – Love Without Boundaries

Hua, post-op!

For those of you who donated money to help Flower (Hua) get the life-saving surgery she needed, I have some great news. Sunday the heart surgeon said that Hua has had a complete repair of her heart defect, and she will not require any further surgery. She will be discharged from the hospital and head home with her family as soon as tickets can be booked for them.

How’s that for amazing? A little girl who was just waiting to die can now go home and live a long and happy life because a bunch of strangers thought that her life had value. That what I love about Love Without Boundaries. “Every child counts” is more than just a motto to them. They are run entirely by volunteers, and their overhead is about as low as an organization can have! So, if you are looking for a good cause to which to donate money, please consider LWB. Their medical page always has a list of kids in China who need life-saving or life altering medical procedures. Like Bing. He is 7 years old and needs surgery to prepare his leg for a prosthesis so that he will be able to walk for the first time. The cost of the surgery and the “new leg” is $1500. I’m not saying you have to donate, I’m just saying that he’s out there. Waiting. For a leg. So he can walk. Seven years old. Waiting.

Sigh. If I ever win the lottery, LWB is going to love me!

First Sister Pictures

My Sweet Ying

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my little Ying-a-Bing? She is just such an amazing little person, and a perfect fit for our family. She is a very happy baby. She has the sweetest little grin that makes her look a lot like Popeye (again, showing my age here!). She is also very smart and curious. Tuesday night, just before bedtime, Miss Ying decided she was hungry. So, she went into the kitchen (walking, mostly), opened the cabinet where I keep the baby food, and pulled out a jar then sat down in the floor to try to figure out how to open it. She’s been eating a jar of mixed cereal and fruit most nights as a bedtime snack, and I guess she just decided that Mommy wasn’t getting to it fast enough for her! Man, does that little girl love to eat (again, perfect for our family). She has slowed down a little, but she still likes 3 meals a day and at least 3 snacks. Olivia loves to help feed her, and our motto has become, “Just keep the food coming.” Still, she is unbelievably tiny – 20 months old and wearing clothes meant for 6-9 month olds. But the abundance of good nutrition is paying off. She’s getting stronger every day and her hair is even starting to fill in.

Last night I was looking at her and I was surprised to realize just how much I really do love this child. My comment at the time was, “Could she be any more perfect?” How lucky am I to have hit the adoption jackpot twice – two beautiful, smart, sweet, absolutely perfect daughters!

She's Walking!

Miss Ying decided that Easter weekend would be a good time to go for a little walk. She started Friday with a short trip across the family room and hasn't slowed down. There's still a bit more falling than walking, but she's getting the hang of it! I love to see how proud she is when she makes it to where ever she was headed!

For those of you thinking about Flower, I am happy to report that she has the money needed for her surgery. She is in the hospital now waiting for the surgeon to determine when to operate. I’ll keep you posted.

Saving Flower

This photo is of a farming family in China. The little girl, six-year-old Flower, is dying of a heart condition. Her parents cannot afford the over $4000 it will cost for Flower to have this operation. Because she is not an orphan, she doesn’t qualify for free medical help. Fortunately, the good people at my favorite charity, Love Without Boundaries, believe “Every Child Counts”. They understand that sometimes, when Chinese parents choose NOT to abandon a child with a medical condition, they end up in need of help. Flower’s family needs help.

As you know, Ying needs surgery to save her eye sight. I am very fortunate because I have medical insurance that will pay most of her expenses. The highly-qualified ophthalmic plastic surgeon who will perform the two procedures she needs has an office 10 minutes from my house, and the hospital is even closer than that. Everything my child needs is easily within my reach. What a blessing that is! I can’t imagine how Flower’s poor parents must feel knowing that she needs surgery to save her very life and not being able to provide it for her.

No parent should ever have to stand by and watch a child die due to a simple lack of money. Never.

Sunday is Easter – a time to celebrate life. What better way to celebrate life than to give a child a chance to live? If each of us bought one less bag of Easter candy and sent that $3 to Flower, she would have enough money for her life-saving operation. Think about it – a bag of Snickers, or a child’s life.

If you want to donate money to help save Flower’s life, please visit the Love Without Boundaries site here.

"It is a poverty that a child should die so we may live as we please." -Mother Teresa

Ying's Eyes

Ying had her appointment with the pediatric ophthalmologist on Thursday. He says her ptosis is so sever that she needs a type of operation called a frontalis sling procedure. Basically, they will have to make a sling out of tissue to hold up her little eyelids. This means she will need another specialist – an ophthalmic plastic surgeon. Who knew there even was such a person? The poor baby will also need a second procedure on her lower lids. It seems that she also has congenital epiblepharon (her bottom lashes roll in and rub against her eyes).

We have an appointment with “the lid man” on April 18th. I won’t know any of the hows or whens until after that appointment. Dr. G did say that Ying is near-sighted and will need glasses probably before kindergarten. Sigh. Poor thing. I just have to remind myself that it could be worse. At least she can see, and after the surgery, she will be able to see even better.

You may have noticed that I refer to Ying by her Chinese name. We started calling her Ying (pronounced “Ing” – like Inga without the “a”) in China because she responded to her name and is even able to say it. Olivia and I have decided that we really like the name Ying, and it just suits her, so Elizabeth is Ying and probably will be for a good, long while!

Look Out Hollywood

My two beautiful girls were on the local news this week. They were doing a piece on the changes to China’s adoption laws, and the opening scene is my girls meeting for the first time at the airport. Yeah, a camera crew actually showed up at 11 pm to meet us! Hey, at least the girls look great!

(For my non-techie readers, click on the words "local news" in the first sentence to see the video.)

We're Home

Sisters.

Mommy's little helper

Kiss me, you fool!

Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!!

After a long and exhausting trip that ended with a missed connection and a 3-hour bus ride, we finally arrived home late Thursday night. Ying and her big sister have hit it off like a house on fire. Yesterday, at her doctor's appointment, Ying would only stop crying if Olivia was holding her. It was so sweet. That's not to say that Olivia hasn't had some "I'm not so sure about this big sister thing" moments that have really reinforced my decision not to take her to China. Still, I think in another week or two the three of us will have gelled into a real family.

Heading Home

We are on our way out the door for the long trip home! A little over 24 hours from now, I will be hugging my baby for the first time in 2 loooooong weeks. I can't wait. We have had an amazing trip. Owen and I both love China and her people so much, but like the girl said, "There's no place like home." Mom, can you please get us a half gallon of whole milk and some watermelon (just a small carton of chuncks). Ying loves watermelon, noodles, and french fries! I can't wait for you all to meet her. She is everything wonderful in a 12-pound package!

See you soon!

If it's Tuesday, this must be Guangzhou

Miss Smoochie Face

The real China

See my shoe?

I can't be bothered with pictures, I'm eating!

What? Huh? Me? I'm just eating, ma!

Morning! It’s Tuesday, and our guide, Ann, is at the consulate right now presenting our papers. If all goes well, we will get Ying’s visa tomorrow. We slept in this morning, had a late breakfast, then went out for a walk with Lynda and her daughter. Later, we are going to take a cab to the department store to look for a stroller for the trip home. Tonight, I’m going to drag Owen and Ying to the Cow and Bridge for dinner. It is the best Tai food ever.

Last night we went on the Pearl River cruise. It was a nice boat ride. Ying was holding court as we got on and off of the boat. She was smiling, waving, giving mommy kisses (YEAH!) – anything to get a laugh. She had a huge crowd of local people hanging around her laughing at her every move. She was eating it up. Everyone else seems to think she is as wonderful as I do!

Tomorrow is our last day, and I have to admit, I am ready to come home. I love China, but I miss my girl like crazy, and I just want to hold her! See you Thursday, baby!

A Quick Note

I have a few minutes before we have to leave for the Pearl River cruise, so I thought I’d post a couple of quick pictures. These were taken at Ying’s SWI sometime between October and now. The lady holding her is her nanny. That’s the smile I’ve been trying to catch.

Ying continues to be a very happy baby. She is very entertaining – waving, clapping, and patting her mouth while going “wa, wa, wa, wa, wa”. She is a great sleeper and likes to nap, so she will fit in well at our house!

Owen and I have shopped ourselves silly. Really, it’s not like we have a lot else to do. We have walked at least a couple of hours every day trying to see the “real” China. I think we’ve found it a time or two – mostly down little back streets.

Well, I have to get the girl ready to go. I’d forgotten about diaper changing. You can never go anywhere until baby has a clean diapy!

More photos (because that's why you're here!)

We're in Guangzhou

Visa photo

Leaving Nanchang

Hi ya, Big Sister!

Hi! We've made it to the last leg of our trip - Guangzhou. We took Ying in for her physical today. She is very healthy, but small (hmm, I think I said that already!). The doctor who did her exam was the same doctor who did Olivia's exam three years ago. Owen and I are both missing the food in Nanchang. It was great - very spicy. Here, everyting is so bland! We'll have to have our guide help us find some spice.

Ying is still very attached to Owen, but it is getting better. He can actually sit her down now without a total meltdown. Poor kid, he has been a trooper. Julia, you should be very proud of your son. He is a great big brother and has taken such good care of Ying. I know it gets old having a baby velcro-ed to you, but he is very sweet to her.

I am totally smitten with this little angel. She is so sweet and funny. She likes to smile. I can't wait to introduce her to her big sister. I know they are going to be quite a pair! We are calling her Ying (pronounced "Ing") because she knows her name. She's even saying it now. She can say Ying, Mama, and hi. Pretty good for a week, huh.

Hope everyone is doing well. We are ready to come home. I miss my girl like crazy. 5 more days!

More photos

I know that Olivia wants to see more pictures of her baby sister, so here they are, Baby, just for you. Mommy loves you and misses you really much. I'll see you soon.

See my teeth?

Sort of a smile.

E-Baby Naps.

Great Wall Photos

Meet Elizabeth Grace Ying

We met Ying yesterday. She is beautiful, amazing, wonderful, sweet, and overall a pretty darn cute baby. She is very tiny. The clothes I brought are all swimming on her. She is very smart and has the sweetest smile. I hope I can get a picture of it today.

Julia, Owen will call you Monday morning.

Ying really likes Owen and is tolerating me ok. This morning she let me feed her some breakfast and even tried to feed me some, too. But, when push comes to shove, she wants to be with Owen. We'll have to work on that!

Our guide is due here soon, so I'll post again later. Now that I've figured out the picture thing, I'll try to see if I can't get a picture of a smiling baby to show you all!

Hello From Beijing

Well, we're here. We arrived in Beijing yesterday afternoon, and I feel like we haven't stopped since. Today we went to the jade factory (really more like a stop at a rather expensive jade store), climbed the Great Wall, visited a "friendship store" (typical over-priced tourist shop), saw TianAnMen Square and the Forbidden City, took a taxi to the pearl market and shopped, then walked to a nearby mall for dinner. Needless to say, I am exhausted - too exhausted to try to figure out how to download pictures right now. I'll try to figure that out tomorrow so that SUNDAY when I meet E-Baby I'll be able to post her beautiful face.

So far, we are having a great time. The weather has been wonderful - almost too warm for a light jacket.

While we were standing on the Great Wall, my cell phone rang. I answered it, and there I was standing on the Great Wall of China, talking to Owen's mom on the phone. Owen took a picture, so I'll try to post that tomorrow.

We met Kirsten and Roy and Rebecca on the flight from Chicago and we are looking forward to seeing them again when we hit Guangzhou.

Ok, that's it for now. I'm off to bed. Please tell my girl that I love her really much and miss her like crazy.

Tomorrow is THE Day

In less than 24 hours, I will be on a plane heading for China and my second beautiful daughter. The bags are all packed and ready to go – and remarkably within the allowable weight limit. I think I’ve got everything I could possibly need (and then some). And, for some reason, I feel like throwing up. It’s not like me to be nervous about traveling. I think it is the stress over leaving Olivia. If I had known a month ago that it was going to be this hard to leave her, I might have decided to take her with me – even though I know that is a bad idea. She’s a pretty good traveler, but she’s only been 4 for 2 weeks, and she’s used to having Mommy’s undivided attention. That combination would probably result in a lot of melt-downs and a lot of stress for me. So, she is staying home, even though it is breaking my heart. I know she will be fine because my sister and BIL both adore her and treat her like their own. They will do everything possible to make her happy while I’m gone. But, man, am I ever going to miss that sweet smile. And her silly giggles. And hearing, “I love you really much” 50 times a day. It’s only for two weeks. And, when I return, we’ll have our E-Baby home with us. Come on, Mommy. Time to cowboy up. You can do this.