Hello From Beijing

Well, we're here. We arrived in Beijing yesterday afternoon, and I feel like we haven't stopped since. Today we went to the jade factory (really more like a stop at a rather expensive jade store), climbed the Great Wall, visited a "friendship store" (typical over-priced tourist shop), saw TianAnMen Square and the Forbidden City, took a taxi to the pearl market and shopped, then walked to a nearby mall for dinner. Needless to say, I am exhausted - too exhausted to try to figure out how to download pictures right now. I'll try to figure that out tomorrow so that SUNDAY when I meet E-Baby I'll be able to post her beautiful face.

So far, we are having a great time. The weather has been wonderful - almost too warm for a light jacket.

While we were standing on the Great Wall, my cell phone rang. I answered it, and there I was standing on the Great Wall of China, talking to Owen's mom on the phone. Owen took a picture, so I'll try to post that tomorrow.

We met Kirsten and Roy and Rebecca on the flight from Chicago and we are looking forward to seeing them again when we hit Guangzhou.

Ok, that's it for now. I'm off to bed. Please tell my girl that I love her really much and miss her like crazy.

Tomorrow is THE Day

In less than 24 hours, I will be on a plane heading for China and my second beautiful daughter. The bags are all packed and ready to go – and remarkably within the allowable weight limit. I think I’ve got everything I could possibly need (and then some). And, for some reason, I feel like throwing up. It’s not like me to be nervous about traveling. I think it is the stress over leaving Olivia. If I had known a month ago that it was going to be this hard to leave her, I might have decided to take her with me – even though I know that is a bad idea. She’s a pretty good traveler, but she’s only been 4 for 2 weeks, and she’s used to having Mommy’s undivided attention. That combination would probably result in a lot of melt-downs and a lot of stress for me. So, she is staying home, even though it is breaking my heart. I know she will be fine because my sister and BIL both adore her and treat her like their own. They will do everything possible to make her happy while I’m gone. But, man, am I ever going to miss that sweet smile. And her silly giggles. And hearing, “I love you really much” 50 times a day. It’s only for two weeks. And, when I return, we’ll have our E-Baby home with us. Come on, Mommy. Time to cowboy up. You can do this.

Update on Qiu Ying

Less than 48 hours before I am leaving for China, I finally got some new information about Qiu Ying. She is now 29.5 inches tall and weighs 17 pounds. To put that in perspective, when I got the update on Olivia at 10 months old, she weighed 18 ¾ pounds! Qiu Ying has all of her baby teeth and can say a few simple words. She did get the package I sent to her, so hopefully they were able to take some pictures of her with the camera I sent. I guess we’ll find out soon!

Happy Birthday, Baby Sister!

No, it’s not E-Baby’s birthday. It’s MY baby sister’s birthday. Hope it’s a happy one. And can I just add, holy cannoli! I leave for China in 3 days! Ackkkkkkkkkkk!!

Last of the Mommy/Baby Days

Olivia calls them Mommy/Baby Days. I used to just call them “weekends” or “holidays” but for quite awhile, they have been Mommy/Baby Days – those glorious days when there is no work, no school, no daycare, just Mommy and Baby spending the whole day alone together. We don’t have to do anything in particular or go any where; we just have to be together. We love Mommy/Baby Days. Sadly and joyously, our final Mommy/Baby Days are upon us. This weekend will be the last time ever that it is just the two of us. In just over a week, we will become a family of 3 – Mommy and 2 Babies. While we are both thrilled to be adding Qiu Ying to our family, there is a part of me that will miss being just the two of us and will miss Mommy/Baby Days, which I guess will be renamed Mommy/Babies Days. I suppose it’s only natural, in the midst of the joy and excitement of adding a new family member to be just a tad sad to see the old family unit change. There is a special bond between an only parent and an only child – the whole “me and you against the world” thing. I’ll miss that, but I know it’s much healthier for both of us to expand our circle and include someone else to love – our E Baby. Before I know it, it will be them against me!

H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y ! ! !

Happy Birthday, J (aka Uncle Sauce-ear)!

T-7 and Freaking Out

Yeah, I know I’m showing my age here, but I really am freaking out! I leave for China in one week – 7 days – and do you think I’m ready to go? No. Not at all ready to go. I don’t even have the new, clean money I’m supposed to have. And I may have waited until too late to get it. I can just see me driving all over town Monday looking for “good” $100 bills!

But hey, I have an excuse. I’ve been sick. For a very long time. Like a month, which is a very long time to have a cold. Ok, so it’s not just a cold. It’s bronchitis. And now, this week for added fun, it’s an ear infection, too. So, I’m on my second round of antibiotics in two weeks. That’s enough to make anyone tired, and forgetful, and unmotivated. Right?

A week from now, this will all be behind me. And hopefully, my behind will be on a plane bound for Qiu Ying.

I’m adding some Chinese New Year photos. Preschoolers trying to do public performances are always fun to watch. Especially when one of them is your kid.

For Those Who Missed the Pajama Party

Shouldn’t I Be Packing . . . or Something?

I leave for China in 12 days. In 12 days I’ll be off on a 15 day trip to China. I’ll be meeting my new daughter for the very first time. I’ll be leaving my other daughter at home with Aunt M and Uncle Sauce-ear – for 15 days, at their house. So, the whole little family is going to be away from home for over two weeks. Wouldn’t you think that I would be packing like a mad woman? Shouldn’t I have lists and piles and piles of lists? I’m going to need clothes and all kinds of paperwork. E Baby will need clothes and toys and assorted toddler junk. O Baby will need clothes and toys and books and movies and craft stuff. All this various stuff needs to be gathered and sorted and packed into bags. And yet, I don’t seem to see the urgency in it yet. And there’s a bunch of other stuff I need to do before I leave. Stuff like pay my bills, stop the mail, get a haircut, buy some stuff I need to take to China, buy some little gifts to leave for O to open while I’m gone, celebrate the Chinese New Year, stock up on dog food – the list goes on and on. But what I’m I doing tomorrow? Hanging out all morning waiting for the installer guy to come hook up Direct TV. Yeah, that’s a priority right now. I figure my lack of motivation is either one of two things. Either I can’t really believe this is happening, or I just have so much to do that I’m overwhelmed and can’t do any of it. Knowing me, it’s probably both.

Happy Birthday, Princess!

Today is O’s 4th birthday. My baby is growing up so fast. She got herself dressed all by herself today so that she could “show you how proud you are of me”. The baby girl I met in Guangzhou 37 months ago is now a long-legged preschooler. She is smart and funny and kind. What more could a mommy ask for? Her new favorite “thing” is the movie Jump In, which is about a boy who joins a double-dutch team. She loves the movie, she loves the music, but most of all, she love the jumping rope. It is a riot to see her practicing her double-dutch tricks. Some of them are pretty darn good! Of course, it’s all done without ropes since the world’s meanest mommy won’t allow jumping rope in the house. She’s a thinker, too. She’s decided that once baby sister gets home, the two of them and her two best friends can be a double-dutch team.

O was playing on the computer today and typing a letter. She was reading it while she typed. It said, in part, “Your baby sister will be home soon with her family, and then she will live happily ever after.”

Happy birthday, baby girl. And happily ever after.

I Meet Elizabeth 3 Weeks From Sunday

I have been rather impatiently waiting all week to know “the rest of the story” as far as our travel to China goes. I was very relieved to get this information. Now, everything is all set, and I feel much more relaxed about travel.

The most exciting part, of course, is meeting Elizabeth on March 4th. She will be 19 months old that day. I can’t wait to kiss those little cheeks!

So, here’s the breakdown:

Feb 28: Depart for Beijing

Mar.01: Arrive in Beijing and transfer to Jian Guo Garden Hotel.

Mar.02: Visit Tian An Men Square, Forbidden City, lunch. Great Wall.

Mar.03: Explore on our own

Mar.04: Beijing to Nanchang transfer to Gloria Plaza Hotel.

Meet Elizabeth at the hotel in the same day afternoon and sign the agreement!

Mar.05:Go to Civil Affairs for adoption registration, notarization and passport.

Mar.06: Go to the local department store to buy some daily necessities for the child.

Mar.07: Visit the People’s Park

Mar.08: Visit Temple of Teng Wang Ge

Mar.09: Pick up passport. Nanchang to Guangzhou, transfer to Victory Hotel.

Mar.10: Medical for baby and take photos.

Mar.11: Visit Six Banyan Temple.

Mar.12: Pearl River Cruise.

Mar.13: 09:30 am at U.S. Consulate for visa appointment.

Mar.14: 16:00 Pick up the visa in the afternoon.

Mar.15: Leave Guangzhou for home!!!!!!!!!!

Later on Mar 15: O Baby meets E Baby for the first time (and I get to see my big girl for the first time in 2 weeks!)

To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

According to Olivia, the new bed is both “comfer’ble” and “boingy”.

New bed?

Yeah, I bought a new mattress set – an upgrade from the old queen to a king.

You know why.

If I’m going to have to share my sleeping space with not one, but two wiggly, giggly little girls, it should be a BIG sleep space. I guess this is the point where I admit defeat on the whole “she’s going to eventually sleep in her own room” thing. Yeah, didn’t happen. Well, it did, but it didn’t last long. O managed to sleep in her own room for approximately 6 months. Then, we went on vacation and she got used to sleeping with Mommy again. That was 15 months ago. Even the promise of her own fish hasn’t prompted her to make the move. Her room is “too scary”. I thought maybe when baby sister came home, she would sleep in there with baby sister. Um, no. I was informed that baby sister can sleep with “us”. She says she’d sleep in there if I got her a hamster, but good God! I’m not that desperate (yet). Really, a kid in my bed or a rodent in my house? If you know me, that’s a no-brainer! So, now I am the proud owner of a brand new comfer’ble, boingy bed with room for the whole hee-haw family. Yippy! In about 35 days, we’ll see if it sleeps three comfortably.

T -23 and Counting

Yes, it’s true. We have a consulate appointment – it’s March 13th. Granted, it's not the one we’d hoped for (a week earlier) but it’s an appointment, so it’s good. And in 23 days, I will be boarding a United flight to go bring my daughter home. How exciting is that? For now, this is all I know. The rest of the trip is still in the planning stages.

What all the Fuss is About

This is it -the infamous TA (Travel Approval). So many sleepless nights spent waiting on this one little piece of paper. Ah, it feels so good to finally have it!

IT'S HHHHHEEEEERRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEE!!!!!

Don’t ask me how, but our TA (travel approval) actually arrived TODAY! 106 days after my dossier was logged into the CCAA, they have finally invited me to come get Qiu Ying! My agency can now ask for a consulate appointment, and in a few days I should know when I’ll be going to China (right now it looks like about a month from now).

The TA is in the Mail

Or so they say. Someone from the agency spoke to someone at the CCAA who says that our TA was mailed from China today (like sometime in the past 12 hours). So, if this is true, we should actually have travel approval by the end of this week. Once we have travel approval, then we wait again – this time for a consulate appointment. You can’t schedule a consulate appointment without a TA, and you can’t go get your child without a consulate appointment. Of course, the consulate in also in China, which means that if we get our TA on Friday, it will already be the weekend there, so we’ll have to wait until Monday for them to even get our request. Once we have a consulate appointment, then we can actually start planning our trip (you know, like buying airline tickets). Ack! China adoption is so not for the faint of heart!

I Used to Love Roller Coasters

Once, Bill and I went to Busch Gardens Williamsburg on a weekday while kids were still in school. The park was pretty empty, so most of the rides had no lines. When we rode our favorite roller coaster, the Lock Ness Monster, the kid running it said that as long as no one was waiting in line, we could keep riding as long as we wanted. After about the 5th trip, I finally had to say “uncle” and climb off the ride. (Bill made it through two more times.) When I got off, my stomach was churning and my head felt like I’d been hit with a hammer. The ride I loved so much, taken in large doses, was more than I could handle.

My life right now is starting to feel a lot like that roller coaster ride. Each morning I wake up with hope in my heart that this could be the day,

CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK, keep your hands and feet inside the car folks, here we go. UP! UP! UP!

This could be the day.
This could be the day.
This could be the day.

All day long, I walk around with the tension/excitement/stress building.

All evening, I wait for the phone to ring. Woe unto the poor soul who dares to call me while I’m waiting for “the call”. I told some poor girl soliciting for my alma mater to please leave me alone, “I’m waiting for a very important call, and you’re tying up my line.” Yes, I do have call waiting, thank you very much, but I don’t want to take ANY chances on missing the call!

Then finally, about 9 pm, I check my email to see if I’ve received the “sorry, no mail today” message from Stefani. SSSWWWOOOOOOSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. There we go, down to the very bottom again.

No TA today.
No TA today.
No TA today.

The emotional roller coaster of waiting and hoping and praying for word that I can bring my daughter home has the same physical effects as the Lock Nest Monster – my stomach keeps churning like a cement mixer, and I feel like someone’s been using my head for batting practice.

But you know what, this time, I can’t get off the ride. Not until I hear those magic words – you’ve got TA!

Soon? Please?

Daughter Near/Daughter Far

This morning Olivia and I were snuggling and talking (her very effective way of trying to delay having to actually get out of bed). She told me, “I love having a mommy.” It made me cry. It made me cry because I know that Shi Qiu Ying is going to love having a mommy, too – and a big sister. She is going to love being safe, and warm, and fed, and adored. She is going to love being part of a family. And her family is going to love her, too. Well, we already do – we love that sweet cheeked little baby whose picture we look at every day. We love the idea of her. Man, are we ready to love the reality.

What I Know About Elizabeth

Shi Cheng SWI

Not a lot, actually. I know she is living in a social welfare institute in Shi Cheng. County Shi Cheng County is a rural, mountainous region in the south eastern part of Jiangxi province. Most of the families in the area are farmers.

And, I know what the person who wrote her growth report had to say about her:


When she was 3 month old, her legs were quite strong and she could hold her little head smiled sweetly. When she was hungry or sleepy she could ask for care giver to hold her. When she was 4 month old, she could turn her head to find the root of sound if some one called her name and made sound which seemed that she talked to herself. When she was 5 months old, QiuYing could roll over freely and raise her head. When she was happy, she would play with her little hands and she could catch toys. When she was 6 months old, she could sit alone for a while. When other children played she would react excited and wanted to join in. Now she is 7 months old. Though she is not fat or fair, she looks bouncy. Her hair is bushy. She has long eyelashes and beautiful eyes. Her eyes are small, so when she smiles the eyes would turn into a line. People give her nick name “little eyes”, and when she hears the name, she smiles more happily.
QiuYing is an active girl and likes playing with other children, listening to music, noisy place to play, being touch on her face, being called “little eyes”.


You may have notice the part about “now she is 7 months old”. Yeah, well, now she is 17 months old, and I haven’t heard anything new about her since this report was written. Because of the remote location, no one ever visits Shi Cheng. I haven’t been able to receive any updated photos or reports. I just keeping hoping that she is doing ok and developing normally. Most of all, I hope she will be in my arms soon.

The Analytical Skills of an Almost 4 Year Old

She’s a genius, I’m telling ya. The girl is just always thinking. Olivia was watching her new favorite movie. Two groups of rival girls are talking before a competition, and one snooty girl says to the nice girls, “Don’t worry. I’ll let you all take a picture with our trophy.”

O’s response – “A trophy is not a camera.”

I see law school in our future.

Attitude of Entitlement

Lately, I been kind of annoyed with this attitude I’ve notice among people waiting to adopt from China. They act like they’ve ordered a baby from the baby store, and they are irritated that the item isn’t ready to be shipped yet. It results in a lot of bad-mouthing of the Chinese government and how they run their adoption process. Yeah, it was really starting to get on my nerves. Until I realized that I am actually one of “them”.

I’ve been acting pretty entitled myself here lately. I’ve been whining and complaining about the screwy process for sending out TAs. Yes, it is frustrating, and yes, I do want to bring QiuYing home as soon as possible. I tell myself that I’m just worried about MY daughter. But, see, the thing is, technically, she isn’t my daughter – yet. Right now, she is still Shi QiuYing, ward of the ShiCheng County Social Welfare Institute. She is their child, not mine. As much as I may love her, she won’t really be MY daughter until I sit in that office at the civil affairs office and promise to never abandon or abuse her. She is a daughter of China, and they don’t have to let me adopt her. If they do, it will be a privilege – not a right I earned by paying the fees and waiting my turn.

See, China owes me nothing. In fact, I owe them. After all, they let me leave the county once already with one of their greatest national treasures.

Not That It Means Anything, but . . .

Someone whose SC form was Fed Exed back to the CCAA on Friday got her TA today. Yes, today. Now, it could be a fluke. It could be, well I don’t know what it could be. I’m trying not to get too excited, but maybe, just maybe Elizabeth will be coming home soon! Can I getta “AMEN!”?

Ball's Back in Their Court

Well, our new form arrived at the CCAA at 10:03 this morning. All they have to do now is sign my TA and stick it in the mail. Really, that's it. Sign it, mail it. DO IT! NOW!!!! Send my baby home, please. Really, is it too much to ask?

How many times do I need to say I want her?

Apparently, the magic number is 4. That’s how many times the CCAA wants me to tell them that I want to adopt QiuYing. First, I wrote a letter of intent which outlined how I would care for her. Then, I sent a letter with my dossier asking specifically to adopt QiuYing. Then, in the home study, there was a whole section about how I want to adopt QiuYing. So, that’s 3 times that I specially asked the CCAA if I could please adopt QiuYing. Now, they’ve decided that I need to sign a form that says yes, I still want to adopt Qiu Ying – for the forth time. My agency received the form last week. It’s so annoying, because what they should have received was my travel approval so that I could leave in the next couple of weeks. Instead, I get this new form that is going to further delay my travel approval, and because the Chinese New Year falls on February 18th this year, I probably won’t travel before March. Yeah, I’m frustrated. I hate the fact that my daughter is living in an orphanage instead of her own home. I hate the fact that she is learning to walk and talk without me there to see it. Most of all I hate knowing that she is stuck in a place where, because the orphanage is very poor, she isn’t getting proper care or nutrition. You try going to sleep every night knowing that your baby is cold and hungry. It sucks. And all I can do is sign the stinkin’ form, and wait. And wait. And wait. 189 days now since my agency first said I could adopt QiuYing. And still we wait.

Why Mommies Love Christmas